The reason why Brett Favre and the Vikings suck this year

Posted: December 14, 2010 in sports
Tags: , , , , ,

Take a look at last year compared to this year for the Vikes:

Last Year

  • The team is 11-2 going into week 15
  • Brad Childress is the coach
  • Brett Favre: 33td/7int
  • Brett Favre beats the Packers twice
  • Brett Favre’s consecutive games started streak is still alive
  • Brett Favre’s genitals are not a storyline
  • Metrodome is still a dome

This Year

  • Team is 5-8 going into week 15
  • Brad Childress joins the unemployed, it becomes impossible to pick him out of a crowd of people who don’t have jobs.  He looks like a hobo.
  • Brett Favre: 10td/18int
  • Brett Favre loses to the Packers twice
  • Brett Favre’s consecutive games started streak ends at 297
  • Brett Favre’s genitals are a storyline, with Jenn Sterger involved
  • Metrodome looks like my mom’s car after she drives

In fact, I even found a picture of Childress since he was fired.  Is that a Coors Light lanyard?  Maybe they’re using one of his press conferences for a TV ad!  Which explains why Childress is smiling in this pic.

In less than one season, the Vikings tumbled from NFC Championship Game to irrelevant.  The only thing that can explain the Vikings downward spiral is some supernatural phenomenon.  And I have found it.

Have you ever heard of something that can explain the Vikings’ season so well?  Cause I haven’t.  Sidney Rice had that hip injury, but if the Vikings were truly good they would know how to win without one player (see: Bill Belichick leading the Pats to 11-5 after the best player in the NFL tore his ACL).  With the weapons they have (Peterson, Harvin, etc.,) they could invade a small country, and making the playoffs should not have been a problem at all.  They flat out blow this year.  And it’s not because Brett Favre took photos of his viking and sent them to Jenn Sterger.  Or because Brett Favre had a lucky season last year and should have retired, because he doesn’t have it in him anymore.  Or because Brett Favre’s brittle body injures itself every week.  Or because the Vikings wasted a third round on an unproductive Randy Moss (By the way, hasn’t the NFL learned by now that if Bill Belichick is trading a player, he is basically stealing from you?  The player will be of zero value and yield less production than Derek Anderson.)  Or because Brad Childress alienated himself to all the players.  No, no.  Its because this Packers wizard put a level 99 curse on them.  Fo sho.

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